Friday, September 28, 2012

September 28th- My first day home without my girls!

I was finally discharged yesterday! Half my problems aren't fixed, but on the mend hopefully. The cellulitis has gone down tremendously! 2 antibiotics later! Unfortunately I have quite a few antibiotic allergies so the first one they were giving me wasn't strong enough and they added a second. All the nurses and doctors kept asking if it felt better, it looks better, so your tummy must just feel so much better! Haha nope! Part of the cellulitis included not feeling anything since the area was so swollen it was just kind of numb. Now that the swelling has gone down I have feeling and the feeling hurts! We never really figured out what was causing the shaking. It was definitely not seizures so that was reassuring. The best guess my doctor gave me was there is a sleeping disorder that when you wake up you are kind of paralyzed for awhile and with the lack of sleep and all the stress it might be a version of that. The swelling all over has started going down finally, but still worse on my left side. My blood pressure is still out of control which is getting scary. I'm maxed out now on my blood pressure medication and it is still running on the high end. So far my bottom number is still in a healthy range so they don't want to mess with it too much more. I will be seeing my regular doctor quite a bit again for awhile, but at least this time I get to see her instead of some whack job! The doctor at the hospital is convinced once the swelling really goes down and everything my blood pressure will drop back down and I will be lowering the dose on the medication drastically in the next week or two. Man I hope so! I have such a pile of medication I take all day, its ridiculous and I've never taken medication on a daily basis in my life! Well birth control, but no lie I was bad about it and lucky we didn't have these twins a long time ago!

That's me, now the latest on my little girls! I finally got to hold Isabell yesterday! I thought holding Anabell was scary because she is so small, Isabell is a whole new world with how tiny she is! But she was so sweet! It was also the first time we got to see her open her eyes! It totally made my day! I did have a traumatic moment because the cpap has water in it so it doesn't dry her out and it backed up just a tiny bit and I watched her get a nose full of water, she sneezed like 5 times and then turned purple! Thank God for all the machines she is hooked up to so I was able to see just how bad it was getting, but I never want to see that again! It took all I had not to burst into tears! Horrible! But she calmed down and was just fine within a minute or two and I got to hold her for awhile afterwards and know she was just fine. It's crazy she is just so quiet and sweet and totally opposite of her sister! When you look at them in the incubators Isabell looks like the needy one because she is always all snuggled up and Anabell is always all sprawled out relaxed as can be, not a care in the world... but then you hold them and Anabell screams and cries uncontrollably for 20 minutes when you put her down and Isabell was just like "eh, no biggy, later mom!" Even yesterday while I was holding Isabell Jim held Anabell and Anabell was keeping her temp so we got to hold her a long time! Jim held her for a good 2 hours then I held her for almost an hour and she still was mad as can be about having to go back! It was great to be able to hold both my girls though, very precious! Anabell gets to wear clothes now! They are working on her maintaining her body temp, but its so cute seeing her in these tiny tiny clothes! We really don't have anything preemie bought yet so I can't wait to go shopping! The NICU has clothes they can wear but we can bring some in if we want to. They put the girls names on them but they can't guarantee they won't get lost so we have to be prepared for that part. Which I'm totally fine with! In reality once the girls have outgrown any preemie clothes we buy odds are I will just donate them to the NICU anyways. That hospital has done so much for us I would do anything for them! I'm such a believer in paying it forward, it just gets tricky figuring out the best ways to do that and donating some clothes is nothing! Isabell is obviously doing well since we get to hold her, but she is still on the cpap and is having problems digesting her food. We are still waiting on her first real bowel movement. She had a little spot earlier in the week but they gave her a suppository and they don't want to continue doing that and make her rely on them. As for the cpap I want to be concerned but I really can't get to worked up about it. I know she can do it, they take her off for a minute or whatever to clean things and when I held her they had to disconnect it to get her in and out of the incubator and she did JUST fine! I think she is just being stubborn. She will get there when she gets there and not a minute before she decides she is there!

As for going home... When I was told I was getting discharged it took all I had not to burst into tears! After living in that hospital for 2 months it really becomes home! It helped and made it worse at the same time that I had one of my favorite nurses yesterday! I did take a shower before leaving and cried the whole time! My nurse gave me a huge hug when I left! I'm going to miss her and a couple of the others so much! I'm trying to figure out a way to say a special thanks to my favorite nurses, but I had a couple regulars that weren't my favorite but I don't want to be rude to them and want to thank them as well. Its tricky! If any of my nurse friends have any ideas let me know! Otherwise I'm going to try and catch the social worker for the antepartum unit when I'm visiting the girls one of these times and see if she has any recommendations. Tricky part there is she falls under those people I want to give a special thanks to also! Oh well we will figure something out! I already see Christmas and the girls birthday cards for the next 18 years!! After leaving we went out to lunch at this Perkins like a block away and I was thinking how cute and quaint it was because it was kind of hidden and really small til we were leaving and Jim seen a cockroach!!! Icky icky ick! NEVER again! Then went to see the girls and their Grandpa Tony got to see them for the first time! He has had the flu since we delivered and didn't get to see them until yesterday! Pretty exciting! I was exhausted by time we finally left for home! As soon as we got to the car we realized we forgot the bottles the NICU gives us for breastpumping but we were too tired to go back up and get them and decided Target would be quicker. Well at Target we decided it was cheaper and probably better to get the bags since I've been pumping so much and those bottles can take up a lot of room. Great idea til we got home and realized how big a pain in the butt that was going to be! I told Jim I don't know how I will switch the bags if I fill them up when he isn't there and sure enough this morning I spilled at least a good 3 ounces all over myself! Between that and missing the hospital and being so close to the girls I had a good 2 hour cry this morning! It wouldn't be as bad but apparently you can't drive for awhile after having a c section so I have to rely on everyone else to bring me to my girls or anywhere and I just can't ask people to do that! Today worked out because my sister was on vacation and then got sick herself so she hasn't met the girls yet and I was able to twist her arm really hard to take me today! Haha, there wasn't much twisting going on, she is ecstatic! Not sure what I'm going to do next week though, so if anyone wants to meet the girls and I happen to be on your way let me know!! They are so precious and we are so proud of them we can't wait for everyone to meet them in general! We would totally do some Lion King/Simba/lift into the sunset action if we could bring them home and there were any good "Pride Rocks" around! Man, I can't wait to have an excuse for seeing every Disney movie ever made and loving them! We already decided the girls first Disney movie is going to be Cinderella because it comes out on DVD next week and it was one of my favorites! The trick is do I buy 1, 2 or 3 of them? Do they each need their own copy since there is 2 of them? Do I just need 1 copy because they will likely watch it together? Or do I need 3 so we each have one because when they grow up if they take it I will probably be just as sad to see it leave as they would be to leave it? So many questions you don't ask yourself until you have twins!

Anyways, I really don't want to dump more milk on  myself so the more often I pump today the less likely I will have to switch bags in the middle and dump it! Plus my pile of morning meds mixed with lack of sleep is kind of making me sick and I could use a little nap or something so I'm not puking everywhere. So hope everyone has a good weekend! God bless!

Love- Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

Just a special word... It was just a couple weeks ago I was posting about re-teaching myself how to crochet after my great aunt Emma taught me when I was like 7. I'm  devastated to say she actually passed away yesterday afternoon. That really didn't help coming home and being sad. It has definitely been an emotional couple days and my thoughts and prayers are with her children and grandchildren and great grandchildren that I know she treasured with all her heart. She was such a wonderful woman with so many talents and loved by so many people! You know there is truth in that when a little old lady from Kansas can warm the heart of a bratty little girl who just became a mother a couple states away! If anyone is wondering why with the recent birth of my daughters my Facebook picture would be of anything else, that is why. I have a couple pictures from our last trip to Kansas but that is from the trip before on my great aunt and uncles 60th wedding anniversary. In this day and age that says so much that 60 years was even possible. Definitely someone to admire and follow their example! Another friend of mine posted this yesterday and made me think of my cousins missing their mom today...
"Mothers never really die,
They just keep house up in the sky,
They polish the sun by day
And light the stars that shine at night,
Keep the moonbeams silvery bright
And in the heavenly home above
They wait to welcome those they love."

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

September 25th- Mommy isn't doing so good

I will give the good news first! Isabell finally made it off her breathing tube last night! We happened to be right there when they took it out and started her on the cpap! It was the scariest moment in my life! She wasn't going for it at first and we watched her oxygen levels keep going up and down. Finally they found her happy place and she remained stable and her oxygen levels were stable. So 1 more hurdle done for her! They had their head ultrasounds yesterday which came back perfectly normal, no bleeding in their brains. They stayed off the photo therapy yesterday but are back on it today which is to be expected. They will probably go back and forth for a couple weeks on that. Overall the girls are doing great!

Mommy on the other hand... not as great... It started later Sunday night I got a slight fever. It went away right away but I knew it wasn't a good thing. I was able to go into the NICU but had to wear a mask. Then super early yesterday morning I went to drop off my milk and didn't even think about it, but knew I didn't have a fever so I didn't put a mask on but as soon as I got near the girls their nurse yelled at me that I couldn't be in there without a mask. Things got a little twisted and confusing from there. They knew I was on antibiotics and knew I had a fever, but they didn't know what I have is not contagious. So I was only allowed in the NICU yesterday with a mask on and was unable to touch them. It was the worst day ever. I cried everytime I went to see them and cried most the day in general. Finally yesterday evening I sent Jim to talk to the NICU doctor and see when I would be able to touch them again. They said after I had been on the antibiotics for 24 hours, after checking with the nurse I practically ran down there! That was when they put Isabell on the CPAP so I was under the impression she was off limits for awhile. After watching that though I was able to hold Anabell. I had to wear a mask, gloves and this suit thing. It wasn't kangaroo care, I just held her all wrapped up like a normal baby and it made my day! She kept her eyes open most the time I was holding her and I just talked and talked while she watched me! I think it's probably too early, but I swear she smiled a couple times! After that the guilt set in though and I cried some more. I felt horrible that I could hold Anabell but couldn't even touch Isabell. I don't want Isabell to be left out or ever doubt how much she is loved and cared for and I feel like she gets that when we are touching her. Later last night Jim did kangaroo care with Anabell and when he put her back she started crying like usual. Then again I felt horrible and cried and cried because the normal reaction when a baby cries is to run and hold them and make them feel better, but we can't do that. Its horrible hearing a baby cry in general but when its yours and there is nothing you can do to make her feel better, nothing breaks your heart more. So I sat between her with Jim trying to calm her in her incubator and Isabell being all alone and balled and balled and finally walked out and went back to my room. Just writing about this is making me cry again! ah!

I guess I went in a different direction in that last paragraph and never covered what all is wrong with me... I have an infection in the fluid build up/swelling on my tummy. I think they are calling it cellulitis? Usually that comes from the incision site from the c-section but mine looks great! My swelling has gotten so much worse since delivery! My left foot is the worst and gets just massive! They put me on Lasix (sp?) yesterday to try and get me to pee some of this fluid out. It helped at first but there is just so much it barely made an impact. They gave me another one this morning but I think its similar to yesterday and will help but not fix anything. My blood pressure has still been a problem since delivery it has gotten worse actually. They are trying to mess with meds to balance it out but haven't been to successful yet. Then I thought I got a zit on my lip on Saturday or Sunday and found out yesterday that it is a cold sore. So now I'm trying to figure out where in the world I got Herpes because I've never had one before. Then apologizing to Jim because by now I've given it to him. And worst of all, praying I didn't give it to Anabell when I did kangaroo care the other day. I can't quite remember if it was there before or after we did it and I kept giving her kisses. At least that one doesn't make me cry, it just pisses me off! So I started treatment for that yesterday too and that is part of the reason for the mask, so I don't have any contact between my lip and my babies. I think that was all of yesterday's medical problems.

Today has a whole new set of problems. I woke up at like 4am this morning shaking uncontrollably and drooling all over myself. I woke Jim up and had him get the nurse. I thought for sure I was having a seizure because I was completely clenched up and couldn't do anything. Turns out I was having what is called Rigors, which is usually accompanied by a higher fever. I had a mild fever but nothing that should have been that extreme. Everytime I've tried going back to sleep today I wake up shaking again. So I'm exhausted but I give up. They are putting me on another antibiotic to try and get the cellulitis under control. Despite being on antibiotics for a couple days now it keeps spreading and getting worse. They are still trying to work on the swelling and may start me on a diuretic to keep me peeing more since the Lasix has a more immediate effect on the peeing and I need something to keep me going all day. I decided since I have the fever and I just need to start worrying about myself a little more I'm avoiding the NICU today. That probably won't last because as much as I hate all the mom's I've known who leave their babies alone in the NICU for days at a time I just can't be that person for a day even. I need to see them and know they are ok even if I have to suit up and be uncomfortable and not be able to touch them, just to watch them and know they are mine makes me feel a little better. Like I said before about Isabell, I NEVER want them to think they aren't loved and cared about more than anything in the world and that goes for Anabell as well! So we will see on that one, but I need to make some improvements before that happens.

The one bright side for me is that when I delivered I met with a lactation nurse. She gave me this sheet about how much you should aim to be pumping by so many days just so you can have a goal and keep up with it. Well the 10 day goal is 30+ ounces for twins. Well I hit that yesterday on day 4! I pumped 34.2 ounces! I've been pretty proud about how much I've been able to pump! The NICU keeps some in the fridge, then some in the freezer and after you have quite the stock in the freezer they ask you to start keeping it frozen at home... well I started my freezer supply yesterday too! Its all the nurses and everyone can talk about is how much I've been pumping! It feels good to be doing something so wonderful and important for the girls that nobody else can do for them. I know we made it farther than expected and everything, but I still can't help feeling like I failed them in pregnancy so anything I can do now to make it up to them I want to be able to do. I'm kinda hoping if I can keep up with it like this, by time they come home I will have quite the supply built up and can rely on that. I'm all about stocking up on anything I can think of and before this the best I had going was diapers, but this is way cheaper! I have kind of been slacking today on the pumping though, but that is because I've been getting up during the night to continuously pump every 2-3 hours as recommended and I decided to try and get a little sleep since its been coming in so well. So I probably won't hit 30 ounces again today, but I still will have plenty! On that note, I should pump, and I do need to eat something today, and maybe try napping again and hope for no more shakes! I was supposed to be discharged on Monday but I'm starting to wonder if the girls will go home before me at this rate! They keep doing better and better and I keep getting worse and worse! Argh!

Please keep up the prayers for us! They have done so much for us already, look at our amazing little girls! But they can't hurt anything now. Thank you! God bless!

Love- Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

Monday, September 24, 2012

September 24th - A Word From Dad

Hey Everyone,

So far Heather has been doing a wonderful job at updating everyone on the girls progress, but since she is asleep trying to regain some strength I thought I would take some time to fill in everyone today.

Well it is already day four and our girls continue to amaze me everyday. Anabell is already breathing completely on her own and only needs her feeding tube, although she can take some small amounts of milk orally at this point. Isabell is progressing well as she is being lowered on the ventilator support for her breathing. She seems to love taking things at her own pace, which is just fine for me. The girls also had their first ultrasound today to look at the blood vessels in their heads to see how they are progressing. We are still waiting to hear from the doctor, but are always hoping for the best.

Heather is doing pretty good as well. She has been such a strong person through everything and I know will be a great mother. Currently she is battling a little infection from the c-section and had run a fever last night, but is now doing a little better. She has been so adamant about pumping milk for the girls every three hours; I'm glad to see her get some well deserved and needed sleep to try and regain her strength.

Last night I decided to do the kangaroo care with Anabell, since mom isnt't allowed to hold them right now with her fever. It's amazing how tiny she really is, but still able to make a big impact in my world. Holding her in my arms (pretty much my hand) meant the world to me and she gave me quite a few laughs as she tried to grab my whiskers and chest hair, I was even able to see her big smile doing this with the pictures Heather took (see below). Of course after 5 minutes she was out cold on my chest and I think I was out after 10 minutes. I can hardly wait until I can hold her and her sister next.

This morning the girls are now off of the photo therapy and the nurses have taken their masks off allowing us to really see their faces. They are definitely sisters :) Anabell was trying her very hardest to get a look at us and I'm sure she will open her big eyes next time we come into the NICU. Her sister has yet to fully open her eyes, but I know Isabell will get there in due time.

I also want to say thank you to everyone for their tremendous support through Heather's pregnancy and now our NICU journey. Its been a tough roller coaster ride, but these past few days have been some of the greatest in my life and I'm going to relish in the excitement and joy of these two little girls while I can.


Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

"Jim & Heather,
Good Morning!  I just want to congratulate on your little bundles of joy, they are truly precious! J   I know it’s been a very difficult, but I’m so thankful that everyone seems to be doing good.  Just think what a miraculous story you’ll be able to tell them one day!  Also, I want to tell you how much it also meant that you named the girls after Grandma Jean and her twin Joy, wow I still cry every time I think of that.   Wow, what special guardian angels in heaven looking out for Anabel Joy and Isabel Jean.   Jim I look at them and I think of you when your when in the NICU when you were born……look how big & strong you are today. 
Love Lots"

Daddy and Anabell sleeping

Anabell Exploring

Anabell and her Pacifier

Saturday, September 22, 2012

September 22nd- Special day already!

I was up around 4am breastfeeding and decided to go run my milk to the nursery and ended up chatting with the girls nurse for a little bit. She told me we definitely needed to do kangaroo care with Anabell today that we all would love it! By time I got back to my room I was so excited I figured I would never go back to sleep! I heard about Kangaroo Care a couple weeks ago when the lactation nurse came to group and talked to us and was so excited then and just thought it was so amazing. For those that don't know, Kangaroo care is where you hold your baby on your chest and have skin to skin contact. Originally this was done in special circumstances to help mothers of preemie's bond with their babies, but now it has become a regular practice and is highly encouraged by this hospital for sure. It turned more important after a NICU in South America ended up running out of incubators for their NICU babies and had to strap the babies to their mother's to keep them warm. What they found was the babies that were strapped to their mom's actually had more regular breathing and heart rates, improved oxygen blood levels, longer sleep periods, more rapid weight gain, reduction of calorie wasting excess movements, decreased crying, longer periods of alertness, opportunities to breastfeed, earlier bonding, increased likelihood of a shorter hospitalization, improved head growth, and better developmental testing scores later on. So now they recommend parents do Kangaroo Care with their babies in the NICU for at least an hour everyday. Originally I thought as long as they were over 28 weeks we could start right away, but since Isabell is so small they want us to wait a week so she can hopefully gain some weight. But one of the nurses today was thinking Jim could do Kangaroo care with Anabell tomorrow and while they are doing that I could do it with Isabell.

So this afternoon I did Kangaroo care with Anabell, which was so sweet and precious. She was so calm and relaxed. A few times she tried putting her little hand in my mouth and it made my heart flutter at the touch of her soft little hands. I'm so excited to do the same thing with Isabell when she is ready. These little girls mean the world to both of us. The pictures shown below I think describe this moment best of all.

Isabell has already had quite a journey today, she had to have a pic line put in to help her heart's blood flow. This should help relieve some of the work her little body is already doing. In addition to the pic line she is having her dopamine supply removed because her lungs are developing so well. Keep fighting little girl Mommy and Daddy are by your side the whole way.

Finally we were able to change both their diapers, Jim was so nervous changing Anabell and working around the wires and her little body. Pretty good job for his second attempt at changing diapers. Isabell was a little tough as well working around the wires. Its funny because this may be the only time we ever actually look forward to changing their diapers :)

Well we are going to get back to the girls again tonight to see how they are doing...


Heather, Jim, Anabell, and Isabell

Anabell and Mom smiling for the camera

Anabell calm and comfortable with Mommy

Mommy's first kiss to Anabell

Anabell - Don't go Mommy!

Friday, September 21, 2012

September 21st- Babies are here!

As of 10:44am on September 20th 2012 Baby A, now known as Anabell Joy was born via c-section, screaming the second she was out! As of 10:45am on September 20th 2012 Baby B, now known as Isabell Jean was born via c-section, grunting at first and eventually crying! Anabell was born weighing 3 pounds 4.2 ounces and 16 1/4 inches. Isabell was born weighing 2 pounds 0.8 ounces and 13 1/4 inches. They couldn't be more beautiful and we couldn't be more proud parents!

Anabell was on a breathing tube on room air but was able to be weaned down to a nasal cannula this morning. That was when her true colors came out and we realized she is our a little drama queen! She kept pulling the tube out of her nose, putting it in her mouth, and plopping her arm on her forehead like a true star! Eventually the nurses decided if she was breathing well enough with it in her mouth they would leave it, which then progressed to taking it out completely. Since this afternoon she has been completely breathing on her own with no assistance and the same air we are breathing. She has a blue light over her incubator for jaundice, also known as photo therapy, or as Jim has put it, suntanning! She was able to start feeding with my breast milk through one of her IV's today. Now that she has the breathing tube out of her mouth she is able to cry and whimper which is the saddest little sound ever! Especially when she does it when we are leaving, broke our hearts!

Isabell is still on the breathing tube but is very slowly being weaned off. The hope is she would be on a nasal cannula by tomorrow, which may or may not happen anymore. She is taking a little longer, but she is much smaller than her sister and has still been stable and doing well. Her blood pressure occasionally drops, so she definitely doesn't have her mother's currents problems, and she is on dopamine to help keep it up. They are also working on weaning her off that and once that happens she will be able to take my breast milk feedings through an IV also. She is also on the photo therapy for jaundice and enjoying her tanning time! She is definitely a mommy's girl! The first time I got to touch her yesterday her oxygen level had dropped to 79% and I held her little finger and Jim watched it jump up to 95%. It was a very precious moment for me! For how little she is she has quite the little grip and if I get my finger in there she doesn't let go! Anabell on the other hand is definitely a daddy's girl, and wouldn't hold my finger for the life of me until I guilt tripped her last night. But Jim can walk in and she instantly perks up and holds his finger! (For the record, if you look back at previous posts, this matches up to my prediction weeks ago about whose baby was whose!)

The c-section was a terrifying situation for me and resulted in me panicking a couple times. Jim wasn't allowed in the operating room with me while they put the epidural in and I squeezed the life out of the doctor's hands and still hated it. It was so painful and at one point they hit a nerve that sent a sharp pain through my leg and made my leg kick. Once they got that over with I couldn't stop asking for Jim and thought I was going to get sick from the epidural. Once he got there I was able to calm down a little but it was still a strange experience I hope to never have again! I was so proud of Jim! I seriously thought he would end up a fainter/puker when it came time for delivery! I asked him if he could see anything and said not really so I told him to peek. He stood up and didn't sit back down again! He watched both girls come out of my uterus and watched the doctor's stitch everything back up! Just when they were finishing I did get sick and that's where my trip started going downhill. I was unable to keep anything down most the day yesterday. Finally we figured it was probably everytime I tried drinking something besides water, but it was still come and go. When they first wheeled my bed into the NICU I actually threw up all over myself and my nurse! I felt so bad! She was so sweet and blamed herself for turning me around to quick, but I still felt horrible! I was able to see the girls twice yesterday but it was slow going for me and still was today too. They kept me on a magnesium drip for the blood pressure and a pitocin drip to keep my uterus contracted and help heal quicker, along with some potassium because my potassium levels have been low. I was supposed to get off the IV's at 10am this morning and get the catheter out at 6am. Well I happened to have a new nurse who ran around doing a whole lot of nothing all day. The doctors had come in a 8 and said it could all be taken off at that point, but I didn't get the IV's out until 11 and the catheter until 11:30. I was not a very happy camper! Especially after she told me 15 times she just had a to grab something and would be right back to take it off and then would come back and do something else! Argh! My blood pressure was actually really high this morning and I ended up taking quite a bit of medicine to get that under control. But since this afternoon everything has been going well. I've finally been able to not only keep liquids down but some food! My blood pressure has stabilized and now our biggest goal is just working on pumping breast milk. It was going really great but the last 2 times I've tried nothing came out. I'm hoping it was because I hadn't eaten or drank much and so when I go try again now it will come out!? Which is what I'm off to do now! Hope everyone has a good weekend and thank you for the prayers! They have obviously worked miracles and God has done more than we could have imagined. Now our NICU journey begins, but with the continued love, support and prayers from all of you it will hopefully be a short trip! God bless you all!

Love Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell
Daddy waiting to go into the operating room!

Operating room, carrying Anabell over to her NICU team

Isabell being born!

Anabell in front, Isabell in back, being wheeled through for Mom to see on their way to the NICU

Me trying not to throw up, getting my first glance at the girls!


Isabell holding Mom's finger for the first time! (This is where her oxygen levels went up!)


Anabell doing the Al Bundy pose with her thumb tucked in her diaper!

Mommy and Anabell

Daddy and Anabell, she say's "Peace!"
Anabell and grandma Karen!


Isabell enjoying her suntan!

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

September 19th- Anyday now

Well its official... I was given the choice this morning to either deliver or try upping my meds one last time to gain an extra day or two. I chose the meds. I did a urine sample last night that came back elevated for protein, but the same as the last one. I had labs this morning that also came back just fine. Last of all I had an ultrasound which baby B had elevations, but no gaps. If any of those things change tomorrow I will deliver. If my blood pressure creeps back up again we will deliver. If I have a headache, vision changes, upper gastric pain, we deliver. No exceptions.

I am completely terrified and can't stop crying all morning. I know its wonderful we made it this far, we made it 6 weeks past what they originally thought. But I can't stop feeling like I failed somehow. I am not ready to be done. It was just in the last couple weeks I started seriously having lava belly and feeling them all day everyday. To be done with that already sucks. This pregnancy has not been easy in any way since the beginning, but I really never thought it would end this soon.

I had a feeling right away when I woke up this morning because I had a nurse I've never met, but one of my normal overnight ones kept coming in and chatting. I think she was trying to say goodbye. I feel like a lot of the nurses and staff have stopped in to kind of say goodbye, which isn't helping anything. I was crying already then they walk in the door and it just gets worse! I was asked if I am going to group today and I still haven't decided. My 2 favorite people delivered their twins last week, so they won't be there and I just feel like I'm going to sit there and cry some more.

Oh my other decision is whether I want a vaginal birth or c-section. I have known since I was a teen and most my siblings were having their kids that I wanted a natural birth. That went out the window when we found out we were having twins because either way they put in an epidural because it is so common to deliver A vaginally and B ends up needing a c-section so its in just in case. At least that's what rumor says and in my case would probably be likely. A c-section terrifies me! Right along with the epidural! I don't have problems with needles, but I really don't want one in my spine! I don't think a vaginal birth would be the best choice in my situation though. I'm guessing if I was induced it would be a long slow labor since I'm still so early and haven't had any contractions or any signs of labor yet. With my blood pressure already being a problem I can't see that doing me any good, and with baby B having problems off and on I don't think it would do her much good either. The doctors were open since my baby A is currently head down and they want to be supportive of whatever my decision but I think I'm just going to go with the c-section unless anyone has a good opposing viewpoint?

I'm going to keep this one shorter, I'm not exactly in the mood but figured you all might want to know the babies are on their way. I have no idea how soon I will be able to update and let you know they are delivering right now, or I already had them, but I will do my best and maybe if need be have Jim give the quick update. Hope everyone else is have a wonderful international talk like a pirate day! Apparently if you go to Krispy Kreme's and talk like a pirate you get a free doughnut and if you dress like a pirate and talk like one you get a free box... all my pirate friends feel free to just drop off those doughnuts at the hospital for me! Yum! God bless!

Love-Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

September 18th- More rough news

Again, my lack of updates, I'm sorry! Things have just been changing so fast its hard to keep up! Starting with last Friday... Baby B some elevations in her dopplers. We did them again on Saturday and they were completely normal though! When they don't have absents we do every other day ultrasounds. So Monday they were normal again and actually better than Baby A's! At least we are pretty sure that's who we had. They totally switched positions on Monday and we are pretty sure who was A and who was B but there is really no way of knowing for sure. Either way they were both normal which was great! That's most the update on the babies to this point.

As for me, that is a whole other story. My blood pressure has been getting higher and higher since Friday or Saturday. Or at least hanging out in the higher zone. They did labs on Monday that all came back pretty much the same as last week, either way still normal. Over the weekend at one point one of my nurses was threatening me that I would have to deliver that night if it didn't go down, luckily I got my meds and it did! Well yesterday they changed my meds from 500mg. twice a day to 400mg 3 times a day. Then today we changed them again to 500mg. 3 times a day.

I was a little annoyed on Saturday when I had the doctor that sent me home last time and I felt like faked some of my dopplers and was just not my favorite doctor. Well Saturday when she came in the first words out of her mouth were "well we knew you would be back at some point." I was instantly mad! If you knew I would be back why did you send me home in the first place?!!? But I also asked her what would determine delivery for her. She said if my blood pressure gets worse and we are chasing it with meds daily, or if there are any reversals, or consistent absents and high blood pressure etc. Her magic number was actually we wouldn't go past 32 weeks unlike last week I had 32-34 weeks. The good side of that was she said there isn't a lot of difference between delivering at 32 and even 36. They are pretty much developed, just need to gain weight, and their survival rate doesn't change much. That's why at one point the other mom with similar problems was told 32 weeks and why the doctor now told me 32 weeks, because at that point its better to be out than in.

So that was Saturday... I am on every other day weights and since Saturday I have gained 8 pounds and rapid weight gain is a symptom the preeclampsia is worsening. Plus my blood pressure and consistently messing with my meds without much change. Plus I am super swollen in my hands, feet and eyes, which the eyes I was blaming on allergies, but the doctor thinks its the preeclampsia. So today the doctor is thinking we might not make it to the end of the week. I have another ultrasound tomorrow and she even said with the blood pressure, if we have any absents tomorrow we will probably be talking delivery. I kind of had a feeling when I woke up this morning, and so it didn't come as a huge shock when the doctor just came in. Crazy I was just planning being a mom in 5 weeks max, then 3 weeks and now less than a week! On the bright side, we weren't supposed to make it this far, we were supposed to deliver 6 weeks ago so I am extremely grateful for everyday we've been given so far.

Ironically the NICU nurse practitioner came and talked to me right before the doctor came in. We were talking about it in group last week and the social worker highly recommended I request them to come talk to us again since we have actually hit 2 milestones since we last talked to them. (24 weeks- viability, and 28 weeks- another month closer) They were supposed to come in last night when Jim was here but they ended up pretty busy, so I wish she would have waited til tonight when Jim got here but I guess you have to take it when you can. The social worker was right in how much has changed. Basically survival isn't a concern anymore, unless something drastic and unlikely happens they should both survive. I thought this hospital tries to get them out by 36 weeks but the nurse said they would likely go home between 38 and 40 weeks. There are concerns about a valve connecting their heart to I can't remember what that stays open in the uterus to allow blood from the placenta to the heart to whatever, then back to the heart and back to the placenta. It should close after delivery but is more likely to stay open in preemies. They will likely be on some sort of breathing device, depending how much help they need determines which device they need. Hopefully since I had the steroid shots twice it won't be as drastic of measures. There is a chance they will need surfactant shots to help keep their lung inflated because that is something they are still producing inside me right now and they may not have enough of. There is a chance of problems with their guts and not taking milk very well for a little while. I can't remember all the problems that could happen with their guts but I thought it was mostly milk related. There is a chance of brain hemorrhages from these 4 ventricles in their brains but their skull caps aren't connected yet so swelling in their heads is ok to a point. Just something they monitor for and if it gets severe enough may have to do surgery. They will likely have jaundice and have blue lamps to help their skin color return to normal. As for long term effects, the most common will be learning disabilities, ADHD, ADD, just slower at learning, speech delays, etc. The bright side is they should be far enough along that blindness won't be an issue. Overall lots of potential problems, but they could have none of them, some of them, all of them, no way of knowing. Its good to be prepared though.

I'm just going to leave this medical for the day, hope everyone is having a good week! God bless!

Love- Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

September 13th- Big Babies!

So the babies really aren't "big" babies yet, but they are growing! We had our growth scan today and Baby A was 2 pounds 13 ounces, so she gained a pound exactly and Baby B was 2 pounds 2 ounces, so she gained 14 ounces. I was hoping for at least 2 pound babies and I got my wish, so that's good! I was up most the night last night practically crying I was in so much pain and thanks to the ultrasound I now know why... Baby A made her home with her head in my right hip and her butt in my left! My nurse was all worried I was going into pre-term labor, but I had a feeling she was just laying funny. I've had the pain before and that was back when she liked to kick me in the hip, at least now she is too big to do that! Plus my little Baby B has made a home in my right ribs again! Her head is right where my ribs meet, the sternum? and basically she is lying flush up to them all the way down. Not cool babies! It was pretty funny because I asked the tech if she was really laying that high on my ribs or if she had the wand angled and she moved it so it was looking straight down and was like nope, she is really that high. Then she used her other hand and poked my belly and we watched on the ultrasound her poking Baby B right by her head! It was hilarious! OK, maybe I'm the only one that thinks it's funny that my baby was getting poked, but I've never seen someone do that and realizing that she is really that close to touch, the tech was barely pressing down! Not to mention I have these babies poking me all day long, I'm just getting even! :)

I also learned during my ultrasound that it sounds like the mom that was having twins and was only a couple days ahead of me and was having problems with dopplers also was delivering today. Kind of sad to hear that, I've really enjoyed talking to her after group. Plus not too many people can relate like she can! Our babies were even in sync for awhile, when she had reversals on her A my B had absents, when she had absents on her A my B had elevations, and when she had elevations on her A my B was completely normal! I'm hoping they don't deliver her until after group today, but I doubt it for 2 reasons. If it was planned which it kinda sounds like it was I'm sure the doctor wanted to get it over with right away this morning, and I just heard the little musical thing go off twice right in a row and what are the odds another set of twins or 2 random babies were just born that close?

On Monday, Baby B had some absents again, but they were just elevations yesterday and today so that's better. They ended up canceling my 24 hour urine on Monday because my lab work from that morning came back completely normal and they determined even if my urine/protein level was high it wouldn't change their course of treatment at the moment. Although all of Baby A's dopplers have been coming back just fine she has had some problems with her heart rate on the monitors. Sometimes it dips super low and  sometimes it goes pretty high. In other words, I'm ending up on the stupid monitors for more like 3 hours a day! :( It doesn't stay in either place very long, but my nurses are watching closely. I will probably have a short break from ultrasounds again since they don't get too concerned about the elevations, they just don't want to see the absents. I wouldn't have had one today but my growth scan was already scheduled and I was looking forward to it.

I think that's all the medical stuff for the week so far. I started crocheting again on Monday since my headaches have cleared up. I'm not a whole lot further, but we're making progress! One of my overnight nurses crochets and everytime she comes in she gives me crap because I'm using a small hook I guess and I have such super tight stitches. The super tight stitches I agree with, but I can't stop that now, but I like the hook size. Either way she keeps telling me its going to take a year just to finish the first one. We will see. Apparently someone or somehow they got a bunch of fabric on the unit to make those tie blankets and one of my nurses brought me in some for that. I haven't actually opened it yet but there looks like a lot of fabric in it. I'm not sure if it's to make 2 or make 1 big one. If it's one big one I might keep it for myself and save my girls some drama! (Plus I kind of always wanted one!) Obviously if I can cut it into 2 I will, so don't think bad things about me!

Then my last big time waster, I'm trying to get into couponing. It would be so much easier if I had a printer available because there are so many coupons online, but I'm trying to learn still. I found some good websites that basically show you the exact coupons and where to get them and how to do it. My problem is just getting stocked up on coupons in the first place! So if anyone has some coupons you don't want.... !!! No matter what, with twins on the way, we are going to have to save some money somehow, so why not try it at least? Plus I may have watched a marathon day of Extreme Couponing a couple weeks ago and that show is inspiring! Do I want a basement full of food I will never eat before it expires? Heck no! Would I love to find all those deals though and instead of filling my basement fill a foodshelf? Heck yeah! Plus I remember when I quit Solutran I knew it was coming and had used half my bonus that year and stocked up on a couple months worth of shampoo/conditioner/soap/toothpaste/deodorant that kinda stuff and even though I didn't use coupons it was still the best thing I ever could have done! I was lucky I was hired full time at the Academy so quick after I quit Solutran, but otherwise who knew how long it would be until I had a regular income again? That safety net, and knowing I wouldn't have to worry about my hygiene at least was so reassuring. So anyways, that's my new hobby. I haven't actually made Jim go shopping yet, but we're getting close!

I think that's about all I have for today. Plus I have to get in the shower and get my lunch ordered soon so I can go to group. I'm a little bummed I didn't get my 2-3 hour nap in this morning, especially after so little sleep last night, but I look forward to group every week and don't want to miss that! Peggy, the social worker, was trying to get the lactation consultant to come in and talk to us today and that should be pretty interesting. So fingers crossed for a nap after group! Haha!

Hope you are all finding the bright side of this cloudy/icky looking day! God bless!

Love- Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

Sunday, September 9, 2012

September 9th- 28 Weeks!!

I know it's been awhile again, but it's been a rough couple days! My blood pressure has been high since Thursday and starting on Friday I had a constant headache that didn't go away until today finally. Friday was a really hard day for me too. I was having a hard time with I can't go to the bathroom without my blood pressure spiking, or do anything for that matter. I was having a hard time with hearing in group all the time how the other mom's have bad days and meltdowns and it made me realize since this all started 5 weeks ago I haven't had a chance to to breakdown and cry. I haven't really had that luxury because if I do my blood pressure gets way out of control and then I have to worry about having to deliver. So with my blood pressure already being high the last couple days I decided on Friday to ask the doctor if we could up my blood pressure medication. Her response was they didn't want to do that because if it was the preeclampsia they didn't want to mask my symptoms and if my blood pressure continues being a problem we have to start thinking about delivering. Besides that I asked if there was a magic number that they won't let me go past for delivering and she told me definitely not past 34 weeks but likely closer to 32. The whole time I was in the middle of an ultrasound and when the doctors left I just started sobbing. Poor Rhonda, one of my favorite ultrasound techs, had no idea what to say or do! Usually we have these happy go lucky conversations and here I was bawling! She tried though, and I know she went out and told my nurse, which luckily was Cherie, one of my all time favorite nurses, but I had it in my head it was my meltdown day and I was taking advantage of it while I could! Jim ended up leaving work because he was worried about me, because I had text him and told him the conversation with the doctor and how I felt like if I cried and my blood pressure spiked I was going to have to deliver, so I was crying and no guarantee I wouldn't deliver by the end of the day at this rate. Well they started checking my blood pressure more often because of it being so high lately and when Cherie checked it in the afternoon it was fairly high, which resulted in 2 things. 1.) I told her my concerns and hope to get my blood pressure medication upped but how the doctor shot that down quick. She took it in her hands and advocated for me and convinced the doctor to up it. I was so grateful! And 2.) We realized my blood pressure machine was broken! It kept refilling everytime and turning my hand purple and popping the veins out of my hand and sure enough my blood pressure would be outrageous! It's sort of a which came first the chicken or the egg situation, but she changed the cuff and sure enough it got better.

Sad to say most the weekend my blood pressure has still been higher and with that I had a horrible headache for 2 days. I still have a bad feeling it won't be long before they decide enough is enough, and I won't make it another week, but I can at least say I made it to my third trimester as of today! I always heard preeclampsia can change quick and I went from being just fine and feeling a little like why am I even here to I feel miserable and feel like I actually need to be in the hospital. Tomorrow and Tuesday will probably give me some answers and hopefully a better idea where we are sitting. I have a 24 hour urine starting at midnight tonight, labs tomorrow and the first ultrasound since Friday. Baby B has had some elevations but her last couple ultrasounds overall have been decent and no gaps so they decided to give me the weekend off. Coincidentally the girls have not agreed to that idea and have seriously not stopped kicking and wrestling in 4 days! They don't even slow down at night and I have lost some sleep over it! I think it was Thursday I told Jim to come feel and maybe they would stop because they usually don't like to show off for other people! Sure enough as soon as he put his hand on my belly there were a couple little flutters and they quit. So Jim put his cheek on my belly so he could try to hear them and just as I said I wouldn't do that if you don't want to get kicked in the cheek, BAM! A good solid kick right in his cheek! It was hilarious! Pretty cute too! 

Also on Friday I ended up getting acupuncture! I've heard the other mom's talk about it in group because they do it Wednesdays and Fridays and on Wednesday my nurse had put me on the list because I had a headache but they ran out of time. So I was up first on Friday! It was another very strange experience! There were a couple needles that seriously hurt when they put them in! My ears are still sore! It did get rid of my headache on Friday for like half an hour but then it came back strong as ever! :( I can't say if it was the acupuncture or the increase in medication but the swelling in my feet went back down. I guess now that I had it once I am on priority because they think the more you do it the better the effect, so I get it again this Friday! :s I'm not real sure how I feel about that yet! I don't have a lot of problems with needles, but that was pretty intense!

I have had a couple visitors this last week. I forgot to mention on Wednesday that my aunt stopped by with my cousin and brought me some treats! Wisconsin has the best cheese and even though I think you can find them in most grocery stores, even in Minnesota, but the first time I had ranch cheese curds was at my aunt and uncle's and it's just not the same if they don't come from there! So she brought me a bag of them, and man were they delicious!! I shared with Jim but he knows how much I love them so I ate most the bag! Plus she brought me some white chocolate truffle things that were melt in your mouth heaven!! Yummy! Thanks Sue! Friday a friend of mine named Amanda, but not the Amanda I usually talk about, stopped by! She is pregnant too and so cute! She brought the girls their own little blankies which were adorable! They are both pink and one is covered with butterflies and flowers and the other one just has one butterfly but it's the same as the ones all over the other blankie! So they match, but are different which is perfect! Also 2 little outfit sets which are adorable as can be! I get so excited about all the cute little clothes! I kinda feel like a kid getting new Barbies and clothes! Haha! Like sometimes I don't feel mature enough to be having kids, I just think about all the cute little things and not the fact that I'm actually going to have 2 little humans depending on me in 4-6 weeks! But that part just scares me to no end, which probably raises my blood pressure and I really don't think I'm ready to be a mom in a couple days! Friday night Jim's parents stopped by and picked us up pizza, which was fantastic! Yum! Then Saturday my other friend Amanda, the one I usually talk about, stopped by for awhile. Helped the time go by I guess, but it was hard to put on a happy face when I was pretty bummed.

I'm feeling much better today! Blood pressure still up, but no headache! I am blaming part of my blood pressure on the Vikings game today! Very intense, but very awesome game! I love football season! My nurse laughed at me because Jim started talking to the TV and I said come on hunny, we don't watch them because we think they will win! Then they won! That probably helped my mood though. I haven't been nearly as bummed today either. I'm back on the up-swing! My doctor for the week cracked me up this morning though! One of the residents commented on my crocheting and said oh nice, what are you knitting?! I kinda mumbled I'm crocheting a blanket. But my doctor piped up with that isn't knitting, that's crocheting! My mom crocheted, but I knit and it didn't look anything like that! I kinda gave him a funny look and he goes, what, what else was there to do in the winter growing up on a farm?! I guess if you can knit, you probably have pretty good surgery hands too. At least I'm going with that! I'm kind of hoping to make it around until Dr. Prosen is back up here. The ultrasound tech told me last week one of her most common surgeries is blood transfusions on the babies in the uterus! Maybe that is pretty common, but that knocked my socks off! There are quite a few nurses and ultrasound techs and everyone that comments on how amazing she is at her job though, and I really like her. Although Dr. Ramin whom is my doctor this week doesn't seem to shabby either, and he was talking about how he used to work at Mayo today. I feel good about that too I guess.

I think that is at least the gist of my week, but it's been a little stressful and I haven't been all there for half of it. As long as I don't have a headache I will try keeping everyone updated since its kind of a busy couple days here. But I really didn't do anything the last couple days with the nasty headache, crocheting got put on hold, the blog got put on hold, even Jim kinda got put on the back burner while I concentrated on not making my headache worse! Anyways, I hope everyone had a great weekend, congratulations to the Vikings fans, sorry to the Packers fans, and God bless everyone!

Love- Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

September 5th- In a funk

I know I haven't written in a couple days again, but I'm in a funk and can't get out of it. I'm just crabby and don't want to talk to anyone. I haven't been feeling too good and haven't had a ton of good news the last couple days. Baby A is good as always, but Baby B is back to either being elevated or having gaps, or today she had both. We are back on daily ultrasounds which is frustrating because it gets stressful laying there everyday waiting for them to get to Baby B and hoping she isn't any worse. Then wondering how long they will just let her hang out with the gaps and the elevations. I haven't had a chance to talk to the doctor about it, but I worry that eventually they will decide enough is enough, she isn't worse but the constant mild distress she is under has to become a problem eventually right? We had group today which wasn't very eventful, but the other twins mom that has the exact same problem with the dopplers was there today. We chatted afterwards and she told me hers have had some reversals which is the next step and they redid her ultrasound later in the day so it wasn't an immediate must deliver. That was comforting, but then she said either way the doctors plan on delivering her at 32 weeks due to the constant distress. I know nobody is the same but I'm sure that probably applies to me too and I just haven't asked yet. I was struggling with delivering in 10 weeks, now we are looking at 4 1/2!! That's insane! I'm so not ready for that!

I did another 24 hour urine on Monday which came back the highest its been yet. So apparently the preeclampsia is getting worse again. Depending which doctor I talk to they give me the numbers different, but it was 800 which is higher, but they don't get too concerned until 5,000, so we still have time. Usually they tell me in the 0.3-5.0 range and I'm not sure how 800 translates to that, but that's where we are sitting. I'm a little scared because my blood pressure has been higher the last couple days, last night it was in the 170s and the machine even starting beeping to warn us. Plus the swelling and I've started getting blurry vision and headaches. I thought originally the vision was from this project I'm working on and it being strenuous on my eyes but I'm not too sure now? The one time I had the nurse check my blood pressure but it came back normal.

All in all its been kind of a stressful week and I feel bad because I've been taking it out on Jim. He of course is taking it like a champ and being such a sweetheart. On the bright side, we moved back to my first room today! It's so much bigger than the other room, and I actually have a view!! The other room looked right into the windows the of the office building next door and you hate to open your blinds because there are people right there that can see you all day! This one looks out over the river even though you can't see it, but I know it's there, and has a very pretty skyline. No bathtub, but it was starting to get hard to step out of the tub without falling on my face so this is probably better anyways. Plus we not only have a closet we have some cupboards we can actually put our clothes and stuff in.

My Kansas/Dad's side of the family would be so proud of me!! When I was like 7 my great aunt Emma taught me how to crochet. I was horrible at it and ended up crocheting circles because I messed up the end of every row. My interest didn't last long and I gave up. Well in my boredom this weekend I sent Jim to the store for some yarn and crochet hooks and thanks to youtube was able to remind myself how to crochet and started a blanket! I'm terrified I won't get it done before the babies are here but I'm almost more scared I won't get 2 done and feel like I'm picking favorites already! I have gotten lots of compliments from the doctors and nurses that it's coming along very nicely, so I'm feeling good about it! It came back pretty quick and I even learned how to change colors from youtube. I know I didn't learn that when I was little! I'm feeling really sentimental about it and proud that A.) I'm making something special for my girls and B.) It brings back a lot of memories from when I was little and Kansas and my family. My great aunt used to make the most beautiful blankets and it's fun to learn something that meant so much to her.

Anyways, I'm supposed to be ordering dinner for Jim since he is getting me Taco Bell and he is eating my nasty hospital food for the night! I hope everyone had a good first couple days back to school! God bless you and your families!

Love- Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

Sunday, September 2, 2012

September 2nd- Time flies!

We made it another week! 27 weeks today! Crazy how far we've come! Not too much to report for the day, but I have some swelling in my feet so I might end up with some tests this week after all. Looking at an ultrasound, labs, and possible 24 hour urine collection tomorrow. Probably won't know until the morning though and depending on my blood pressure today. It was a little high this morning but I was also on the verge of hurting someone since I got left on the monitors for almost 2 hours and asked twice to get taken off!! Poor Jim couldn't sleep last night and I woke him up freaking out! My nurse today and yesterday isn't so big on doing my vitals very often so not sure where I'm sitting right now?

I'm having a hard time accepting that in all reality I will be the mother of 2 little girls I can see and touch in probably 10 weeks! 37 weeks is considered full term with mono-di twins and especially with all the problems we have had I'm sure they won't let me go past that. I'm extremely excited to see their little faces and meet them, but terrified at the same time! It's just crazy how fast time flies especially when you think about I've already been on bedrest for 12 weeks and my first hospital stay was over 4 weeks ago now! The last 4 weeks in particular have really flown by, so I can only imagine how quick these last 10 weeks will go! I have a countdown going on my whiteboard in my room that I have 91 days until 40 weeks and even that number blows my mind! It seems like just yesterday I was taking that pregnancy test!

I'm so scared about how hard this is going to be once they are born! I have read that with twins I will spend at least 10 hours a day breastfeeding, plus pumping. We will change 20-30 diapers a day. Plus the fear of being they are identical we will get them mixed up! I'm not as scared about that since I already know one is smaller, but Jim is terrified of that one! I have heard millions of ways to tell them apart, most common being different colored nail polish on their toes, but they are fall/winter babies, we won't be seeing their toes much!! I am thinking about getting their ears pierced after their 2 month shots which I heard is the safe time, but Jim isn't too sure how he feels about that yet. I can go both ways, it would be similar to a circumcision in that it would be better to get the pain over with when they won't remember it, but at the same time who are we to make the decision to put holes in their bodies? We will just play that one by EAR I guess! Haha!

So many things to think about and ponder. Who will they look like? Who will they act like? Will we be good parents? Will they be good kids? Time will tell I guess! Hope everyone is having a relaxing weekend and God bless!

Love- Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell

Saturday, September 1, 2012

September 1st- Just hanging out!

I had another ultrasound yesterday and everything came back great! I think they were trying to make up for the crabby lady by giving me the ultimate over the top sweet/corny lady yesterday but she was way better! She talked to the girls more than me and kept using the baby voice! Haha! I'm not the biggest fan of baby talk, but she was really sweet so I couldn't be mad! Apparently rumors have gone round the clinic with the ultrasound techs how difficult my babies are there too! At least now they are difficult because they are breathing too much and that messes up the dopplers. Before they were a pain because they wouldn't stop kicking each other, so this is way better. I didn't realize their breathing would make it difficult to get their dopplers, but I guess they can give false elevations if the baby is breathing. I love that I'm still learning something new everytime! Baby B had 1/5 of her umbilical dopplers was elevated again but the tech said being we got so many perfect ones it really wasn't anything to be concerned with. I'm a little curious if it had something to do with the ooga booga miracle lady from Thursday? I mean my kidney hasn't hurt since, maybe she worked some magic on the babies too? Like I said before I want to think it's all a joke but if it works it works.

I'm pretty much just taking up a bed right now. I don't have another ultrasound until Monday and not sure after that? I really don't have anything exciting going on. The only things I really have going on is monitoring for an hour twice a day, blood pressure a couple times a day, my meds twice a day and that's all my excitement! Then the nurses give me crap for being so easy! It kind of makes the days go by slower since there isn't anyone checking on me a million times a day or anything going on. I don't even know why the doctors come in everyday? There isn't anything to update me on! I did ask Dr. Rauk on Friday after my ultrasound if they were working on discharging me again or what the plan was? He gave me a look and said "I don't know why but just being in the hospital seems to be working miracles for you guys don't you think? At this point I wouldn't plan on going anywhere, this seems to be the best place for you." So I guess that's the plan for now? But we have a different doctor this week so we'll see what happens? That's when everything seems to change.

Definitely the highlight of my week was my friend Jess that I worked with stopped by! She was the biggest support through my wedding and has definitely been there for my pregnancy too! I miss chatting at work all the time, because she is pregnant too so I asked her everything!! I really haven't had anything to do except play around on the computer and watch TV all week because all my craft things and whatever got packed up and moved when we were home. Plus Jim wasn't really here all week since he was doing all the packing, so I've been a lonely, bored, crabby mess all week! It was SO nice to have someone keep me company and make me laugh! I appreciated it!

Jim and I were able to start dating again today!! We decided to give this sandwich place Milio's a try. Not so great, but worth a try! We got our lunch and Jim wheeled me down to the little courtyard thing. It was all hot and sweaty until Jim's mom and brothers showed up! (It was 90 degrees out today people and we found shade just as his family showed up.... geeze, get your minds out of the gutters people!!!!) It was nice seeing his brothers, they are home for the weekend from college. His youngest brother Jeff just started in Mankato this week so him and Jim had a lot to talk about! His middle brother Dave was here too, which we never get to see him since he goes to school at NDSU and it was nice to catch up. I can totally appreciate for how much we don't see him he tends to just skip to all the funny stories and he's always good for a laugh!

I'm having a really hard time not shopping and spending all my money! I've been all about trying to find coupons and good deals lately and stupid labor day weekend sales are eating me alive!! Carters is 50% off pretty much everything and I found a promo code for another 25% off!! Insanely good deals, but I have no control!! I didn't actually place my order yet because I'm debating between all the cute clothes I "want" and another website I found, that has some great deals on diapers and wipes that I "need." I wanted to be all stocked up on most this stuff before the babies got here, but it became difficult when I haven't been working and I don't know if the babies will be here in 13 weeks or 13 days?! I have to get some things in order and hopefully I will still have time to get stocked up! In the meantime I just have to drool over all the fun stuff I want/need!! I love that it is still just as exciting to buy diapers! I just love it all! I ooh and ahh over EVERY little thing and make Jim look at everything and he just goes "ok sweetheart, yep, uh-huh!" He get's all ooshy gooshy everytime they start kicking, but he's a boy, and not into the shopping thing at all! It's ok, if that is his biggest downfall, which it is, I still have the best husband ever!

Hope everyone is having a wonderful Labor Day weekend! Have fun, be safe, and God bless!

Love- Heather, Jim, Anabell and Isabell